Almost every parent’s nightmare is receiving a call from police saying their child is in custody. Unfortunately, this can happen no matter how old your child is. Whether they’re 14 or 24, those moments can be terrifying and confusing.

In that split second, you’re not just a parent – you’re their guide, their protector, and the person they rely on to do the right thing. But what is the right thing? Who do you call? What are their rights? And how can you prevent a bad situation from becoming worse?

Let’s unpack what every parent should know before that moment ever arrives.

Here are the essential things you should remember:

What Can Police Actually Do?

Police can ask a person of any age to identify themselves. Legally, police must have grounds to request this information, however their discretion is so broad that almost any request should be complied with.

If police are unable to identify a person and that person refuses to provide ID or correct personal information, police have the power to arrest them for identification purposes. This might include:

  • Detaining them at the scene
  • Taking them to the police station to make enquiries

Police can charge an individual for:

  • Failing to identify themselves
  • Providing false information about their identity

This offence carries a fine of $220. However, if committed alongside other offences (such as resisting arrest or assaulting a police officer), it would require your child to attend court.

What Young People Should (and Should Not) Say to Police

What They Should Do:

When interacting with police, young people should keep discussions to an absolute minimum. They should:

  • State their name and address only
  • Request to speak to their parent(s) and/or support person
  • Remain compliant and polite, despite the stress of the situation

What They Should NOT Do:

  • Try to explain themselves – This usually results in making admissions
  • Try to blame someone else for their actions
  • Attempt to run away from police
  • Allow themselves to be interviewed without legal representation

What to Do If Your Child Has Been Arrested

If you receive that dreaded phone call, take these immediate steps:

First: Remind your child not to participate in any interview, whether formal or informal. Even casual conversation with police can be used against them. Although they may think they’re saying the “right things,” their words are often misconstrued and can form part of the prosecution case.

Second: Immediately contact a lawyer who specialises in criminal law. It’s never “too early” to call a lawyer. Legal counsel can advise you and your child on how to proceed, explain your options, and outline what to expect moving forward. By contacting a lawyer immediately, you help protect your child’s rights and their future.

 

Three Key Points to Remember

  1. Identify yourself properly
  2. Do not be interviewed
  3. Call a lawyer immediately

 

*This article was originally posted on Mosman Living and Northern Beaches Living on 9 September 2025